Bethenny’s trusted confidante, Breck Costin, once said:
If you’re a frequent visitor, you will have met Breck a few times before. In case you missed it, take a few minutes and read / watch / listen to his past posts (you will feel so much more centered after, we promise!).
In a recent episode of Just B with Bethenny Frankel, Bethenny makes mention of this concept, so we reached out to Breck to go a bit deeper with it and hear from the source of wisdom himself.
Breck explains that this concept comes from the idea that people have a notion that they can get a “life” if they put their attention on a certain “lifestyle”. These lifestyles may look toward building wealth, appearance, marrying someone who fits the bill who is not necessarily someone you love, or being in perfect shape, and while these are things one can aspire to have, they should not be the end all be all. This idea of a lifestyle will not necessarily scratch the itch. In other words, having or achieving these things won’t give you a “life”.
Breck translates a “life” to a feeling of well-being and a sense of accomplishment. It is something that looks at character over ego and love over adulation. A “life” allows you to look at other people’s success over your own vanity. People who have put together a formidable lifestyle may know this idea as “Anybody who thinks money will make you happy, hasn’t got money”, a quote by producer and film studio executive David Geffen. Breck emphasizes, though, that he is not saying that achieving those things isn’t aspirational, it just does not guarantee a “life”.
Therefore, you can achieve a “lifestyle” from the foundation of profound ethics, through a moral compass, and a true north, but for the most part and hardly ever is the reverse true. Breck explains that as one looks back on their life as they grow older, they do not review how much money they have or how great they are. Rather, they review their character, their relationships with their family and friends, and what kind of human being they were.
“You can build a lifestyle from a formidable life, but you don’t get the benefit of a profound life if your attention is solely on lifestyle.
Breck has an innate talent for excavating the truth in a person’s life, flipping it like a pancake, then serving up radical shifts in perspective and life. His profound instinct has garnered him the status as L.A.’s most renowned private coach for an international clientele of discerning, high-performing individuals. He has transformed the lives of professional athletes, CEO’s, studio heads, music executives, and other people in the entertainment industry; has lead innovative workshops for a diverse demographic.
Breck’s work centers around alchemizing defects, original wounds, and blind spots into assets and advantages for a thriving, generative life. He calls it living in Freedom; that creative childlike, fresh-eyed state of enthusiasm for all aspects of life, and understanding how to use your skills, talents, and resources in the most effective ways. His style is both direct and compassionate, allowing people to dismantle their fantasies so they can develop a genuine sense of what is (and isn’t) possible. His workshops are deep dives into such topics as Radical Ideas (uncovering true purpose), couples workshops like Radical Connection, and his signature Radical Alchemy series that is the foundation of his work. In addition to his private practice and workshops, he is intrinsic in working with entrepreneurs to help launch new initiatives. Breck is a co-founder of several startups, including popular brand, SmartyPants, which was recently acquired by Unilever.
Breck has over thirty years of experience in the field of progressive personal work, leading international workshops several thousand strong, to intimate five-person sessions. His work is deeply rooted in his own experience; a wild and prominent upbringing with a side-serving of dysfunction. He currently has three children and has been married now for over twenty-five years to his wife, who is his muse and teacher. His personal mistakes, challenges, and losses serve as a portal allowing him direct insight and compassion into his client’s struggles and joys.
Bethenny Frankel is a self-made businessperson, tv producer, multiple new york times bestselling author, and mother. Bethenny is the founder & CEO of skinnygirl, a lifestyle brand offering practical solutions to women.